B&B Hotel Bicocca

Staying at the Hotel Bicocca in Milan was an experience that to define surreal is to say little. As soon as we arrived, instead of a friendly welcome, we were trapped in an endless explanation by the owner: twenty good minutes dedicated to rules as obvious as unnecessary. How to turn on the light, how to open a window, how to close a door... all that was missing was a practical demonstration on how to breathe. The tone was patronizing, almost as if the guests were unable to handle the most basic actions of daily life. More than feeling welcomed, one feels observed and judged, as if every slight gesture could be the object of reproach. A stay that should be relaxing turns into a little test of patience. Milan has so much better to offer, and this place is not worth the time nor the inconvenience. So, like a stern epitaph: Here you will find no refreshment, no peace, but the slow weight of useless waiting; Flee, while you still have time, wayfarer, Because even the memory here becomes tormented.

I admit that I did not stay overnight, so my judgment relates exclusively to the treatment received after booking. I had booked a night for January through Booking. Within a few minutes I received ten messages from the hotel: a bombardment of rules and requests, far beyond what was necessary, especially considering that the stay would be in more than a month. Of all those messages only two were actually useful: the request for the arrival time (understandable) and a report on the “wrong” phone number, which however was correct, as confirmed by Booking itself. I responded politely, pointing out that ten consecutive messages are excessive and that certain information can be safely handled at check-in. I also provided an approximate time of my arrival in Milan, not at the facility. The response I received was annoying and sarcastic, as if I was annoying, and accompanied by the justification why I had received so many messages. At that point I preferred to cancel the reservation: if the treatment before arriving is this, I dare not imagine the rest.

If you don't want to be surprised with persistent knocking and ringing at the door (at the end of the evening and after the host had urged us not to open for anyone) then I wouldn't go here. Kids upset. Slept badly. Otherwise fine.